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u n c o n d i t i o n a l
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[17 Jun 2005|02:59pm] |
High School is more than over. It's UNDER YO!
woah. that was too much. i don't even think that made sense. i will stop now.
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[04 Jun 2005|11:47pm] |
Just letting my mind wander.
so i'm reading this book, and it's making me think so much. it's a memoir of this guy during his time in rehab. and this guy is so fucked up. like yo he's so fucked up. and like, i feel like everyones fucked up in some way but some people's fucked upness is just stupid you know but everyone is on some way. once, they were fucvked up and like it's still with them even if they want to forget and its still with them even if they want to remember and make it seem bigger.
so it's making me think a lot. and i really do beleive that everyone has a story to tell. and some people might die before they tell it. soeme might die before they rwally live through it. like, not a life story. but something that stands out that like defines some part of you thats there forever. and i really just like wanna find my story already. and i'm kind of scared that my storys gonna be a fucked up one cause those draw my attention, cause thats part of whats fucked up about me. i have so many layers and one of those layers is the girl that has always desired like not the "fast life" but the terrible one. the drug addict one, like i just wanna know how these people feel and what they think about and what it really feels like to be addicted. see, thats so fucked up that i wanna know what its like to be addicted. i wanna know what it's like to feel all these things and have to take the road less traveled and the tougher trail and come on and feel achievment. cause that is seriously something to be proud of. i honestly dont think i will ever feel the pride of someone that overcame an obstacle. i always just take the paved path. and i will always take the paved path. but i get nervous that i'm just gonna go after all these fucked up things just so i can find my story. i just wanna find my story.
i just wanna write about my story. so other peope know about it. so other people learn from it and cry from it and laugh about it and feel like it was their story.
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[01 Jun 2005|05:40pm] |
NINE MOTHERFUCKER!
Everyone should go read "A Million Little Pieces" by James Frey. I highly reco it. To the max.
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[30 May 2005|06:57pm] |
And airports see it all the time
where someone's last goodbye
blends in with someone's sigh
cause someones coming home
and hand a single rose
and thats the way this wheel keeps working now
and if you never stop when you wave goodbye you just might find if you give it time you might wave hello again, you just might wave hello again
and thats the way this wheel keeps working now
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[27 May 2005|03:54pm] |
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10 days left of being a high school student yo
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[23 May 2005|07:48pm] |
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So I think it's really weird that prom is this Thursday.
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[12 May 2005|01:11pm] |
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mood |
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 calm |
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music |
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STAND UP |
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Oh, how I will not miss the petty high school teenage drama.
It all has to do with growing up. We all need to grow up.
BUFFALO!!
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[10 May 2005|06:16pm] |
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mood |
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 grateful |
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music |
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Dave Matthews Band // Bartender |
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Yes, I am seventeen and still need to hold my mom's hand when I get a shot.
I am so lucky.
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[01 May 2005|06:37pm] |
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music |
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Matchbox 20 // Bright Lights |
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ME AND DEENA WON LOTTO TICKETS FOR RENT AGAIN! WE ARE CRAZY SEXY BITCHES! YOU ARE SO JEAL TO THE MAX TIMES TEN!! i wanna see it again now. joshua kobak plays an amazingly beastly roger.
THATS RIGHT. WE SAT IN THE FRONT ROW. THE ONLY THING THAT WAS IN BETWEEN OUR FACES AND THE STAGE WERE OUR LEGS!!! AND THAT MEANS WE WERE PRACTICALLY ON STAGE! AND THAT MEANS WE WERE, LIKE, IN THE SHOW!!! mmmhm...you're so jealous.
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[26 Apr 2005|01:05pm] |
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music |
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Rob Thomas // When the Heartache Ends |
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It's never easy and you never know
What leaves you crying
And what makes you whole
There ain't no way that I can hold it down
Fallin' to pieces
Forever in doubt
But it's alright
Why don't you tell me again
How you'll still be there
When the heartache ends
But it's alright
Why don't you tell me, my friend
How you'll still be there
When the heartache ends
There ain't nobody who can show you how
To find the surface when you're underground
There ain't no blanket that can hide this cold
There ain't no memory
That ever gets old
But it's alright
Why don't you tell me again
How you'll still be there
When the heartache ends
But it's alright
Why don't you tell me, my friend
How you'll still be there
When the heartache ends
And I move all directions
To the corners and the outskirts
While the lovers and the lonely
Start to whisper all about me
And if I stand here silent
I almost start to feel you fading in
Telling me hold on
Cause it's gonna be alright
Why don't you tell me again
How you'll still be there
When the heartache ends
But it's alright
Why don't you tell me, my friend
How you'll still be there
When the heartache ends
How you'll still be there
When the heartache ends
Say you'll be with me
When the heartache ends
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[24 Apr 2005|04:27pm] |
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Rob Thomas is a sexy beast.
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[23 Apr 2005|10:37pm] |
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mood |
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 alone |
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music |
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The New Radicals // Mother, We Just Can't Get Enough |
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Earlier tonight, in this rain, I was about to run out and run to your house.
I was going to stand there until you came out and I was going to kiss you. And you would have kissed me like you never kissed anyone before in your life.
I always get lost when I try to look for you though.
So I stayed inside, dry and safe.
Safe.
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[22 Apr 2005|11:50am] |
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mood |
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 hyper |
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music |
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The New Workout Plan // Kanye West |
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Yo.
Kanye West is fabulous.
I'm so white.
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[20 Apr 2005|11:51am] |
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mood |
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 hungry |
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music |
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The Beatles // Oh! Darling |
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I'm blind and waiting for you.
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[19 Apr 2005|10:13pm] |
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mood |
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 mellow |
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music |
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Heather Nova // Like Lovers Do |
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Teach me.
I'm a fast learner.
I'll learn your techniques. And what you like. And what you don't like.
I'll learn how you kiss. I'll learn where you like to be kissed.
I'll learn when you like to be held. I'll learn which way you like to hold hands.
I'll learn when to back off. I'll learn when you need a hug and when you need to be laughed at.
I'll learn how to make you happy. I promise, I'll make you so happy.
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[17 Apr 2005|06:33pm] |
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music |
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Sheryl Crow // Strong Enough |
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God, I feel like hell tonight
Tears of rage I cannot fight
I'd be the last to help you understand
Are you strong enough to be my man?
Nothing's true and nothing's right
So let me be alone tonight
Cause you can't change the way I am
Are you strong enough to be my man?
Lie to me
I promise I'll believe
Lie to me
But please don't leave, leave, don't leave
I have a face I cannot show
I make the rules up as I go
So try and love me if you can
Are you strong enough to be my man?
When I've shown you that I just don't care
When I'm throwing punches in the air
When I'm broken down and I can't stand
Would you be man enough to be my man?
Lie to me
I promise, I'll believe
Lie to me
But please don't leave
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[17 Apr 2005|02:54pm] |
There's a fine, fine line
between a lover, and a friend.
There's a fine, fine line
between reality, and pretend;
And you never know 'til you reach the top
if it was worth the uphill climb.
There's a fine, fine line
between love,
and a waste of time
There's a fine, fine line
between a fairy tale, and a lie.
And there's a fine, fine line
between "you're wonderful" and "goodbye".
I guess if someone doesn't love you back
it isn't such a crime
But there's a fine, fine line
between love,
and a waste of your time
And I don't have the time to waste on you anymore.
I don't think that you even know what you're looking for.
For my own sanity I've got to close the door
And walk away...
Oh...
There's a fine, fine line
between together,
and not.
And there's a fine, fine line
between what you wanted,
and what you got.
You gotta go after the things you want
while you're still in your prime.
There's a fine, fine line
between love,
and a waste of time.
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[16 Apr 2005|06:06pm] |
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mood |
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 drained |
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music |
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Red Hot Chili Peppers // Porcelain |
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I got the ultimate reality check fortune cookie of life today:
"Many a false step is made be standing still"
I take things too slow, it's like I'm standing still.
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[14 Apr 2005|12:43pm] |
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mood |
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overwhelmed |
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music |
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Lynyrd Skynyrd // Simple Man |
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"i remembered this one time i never told anybody about. the time we were walking. just the three of us. and i was in the middle. i don't remember where we were walking to or where we were walking from. i don't even remember the season. i just remember walking between them and feeling for the first time that i belonged somewhere"
I love my two best friends. No one beats us, yo.
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